I was standing behind my podium, and I began our presentation. A minute or two into introductions and laying out the reason for our talk, I lost my train of thought. A second or two suddenly grew into a very noticeable and pregnant pause. I glanced across the room at my co-presenter, who was standing behind another podium, hoping he would bail me out. The look on his face told me I was on my own. I glanced up at the audience, and the face of my instructor in the back row of the room. She was looking over her glasses at me with a frown that screamed ‘you aren’t prepared, are you?’
I wasn’t. I didn’t review my notes prior to the class, thinking it would go better if I ‘just winged it’.
In reality I stopped talking about 2.3 seconds ago, but it felt as if we were in Day Three of Mack’s Great Silence. I glanced back down at my notes, and for a brief second I seriously considered running from the classroom, even giving the door a few feet from my podium a sideways glance.
Thankfully, I found enough composure to finish the presentation, and I believe I ended up with a B in the Business Communications course. But I just wanted out of there and left knowing that if I never had to give another presentation in my life, I would be a happy camper.
Fast forward almost exactly 9 years to last week in Boston at the B2B Forum. As I was talking to other attendees and we were discussing our favorite sessions and especially how good the keynotes were, I caught myself thinking ‘I really wish I was presenting here’.
The lesson I’ve learned from this is that your failures can lead to successes. I used to hate public speaking, as most introverts do. Now I love it, because I found a way to learn from my past failures, instead of letting them define my ability to speak in public. I learned from that horrible experience in undergrad, and now prepare meticulously for every presentation. I always know the material well enough that I can ‘just talk about it’, and that greatly improves the quality of my presentations.
Nine years ago I was so nervous in front of a room of undergrads that I seriously considered running from the room, now I love speaking, and get paid to do so. Life can be funny sometimes.
What failures have you used to shape your current successes?
You hit the nail on the head. It can take a lot of practice to make a presentation appear effortless. The ones who seem to “wing it” the best are generally people who take a lot of time to prepare and really know their stuff.
I’m an extreme introvert in public situations and can’t mingle to save my life. But I love giving presentations, whether it’s an audience of 5 or 100. Go figure.
Mack,
Great post… as for a list of failures that have shaped my success…. man that is a blog in itself. If we’re working hard and pushing the envelope, we’re likely failing every single day. Not always in big huge fireball type failures..but in little ways that most will never see, but we will always learn from. Right?
@TomMartin
@TomBLogue Tom I am the same way. I am terrible in networking situations and I really hate that because I know there would be real value for me if I was comfortable connecting with others. I guess that can be what I work on next 😉
@TomMartin @TomMartin Tom I loved this quote from Conan O’Brien from his recent commencement address to Dartmouth: “It is our failure to become our perceived ideal that ultimately defines us and makes us unique. It’s not easy, but if you accept your misfortune and handle it right, your perceived failure can be a catalyst for profound re-invention.”
http://www.presentationzen.com/presentationzen/2011/06/two-great-college-commencement-speeches-.html
Sometimes a little bad stuff can turn into some good stuff.
“Black Seo Guy “Signing Off”
Great thought! For me, scariest thing in the world was to make a presentation for the CEO or a comittee y always giggled and sweat like crazy, trying to keep the nerves down, until i had the chance to prepare (and present) an entire presentation by myself, minutes before going to that room i was sure i was going to faint….but reviews after the presentation made me understand that if your’e doing your job the right way, there is nothing to be afraid of…
One of the most powerful, and often overlooked, ways we interprest our world is through the words we use to talk to ourselves.
Replacing the term Failure, with Feedback may seem like a small shift, but it can make a world of difference.
@edgardiazemes Hey Edgar! When it comes to speaking, we know how we want our presentation to go, so if we make a slight mistake, we notice it but the audience probably does not. It took a while for me to figure that one out 😉
@MackCollier @TomBLogue Ok, Tom – you *can* mingle and Mack you’re *not* terrible at networking. You simply have preconceived notions of what these two things must entail.
Make an effort to find one person in the crowd to have a real conversation with, and be fully present with them. Then do this one more time. In between you’ll likely be stopped by someone who wants to say “hi.” Be fully present with that person. By the time you’re done you’ll have made 3 great connections and will have a whole new outlook on “networking” and “mingling!”
It’s all about that one-on-one connection. 🙂
Mack,
Reading this post brought back a similar memory for me of a time I had to present during one of my MBA classes at Kellogg. I was already a few years into my career and was presenting to high-level executives all the time. I knew my material and was dating my co-presenter, so I was as comfortable as a bug in a rug when I got up to the front of the room.
And for the only time in my life that I can recall, I literally froze. I mean, I simply could not speak. It was as if my body had physically shut down and as soon as I realized it, I panicked, which made it worse. Then I couldn’t move.
My boyfriend/co-presenter took over – after looking at me like I’d lost my mind – and did the rest of the presentation for me. I’ve never forgotten that night. I remember the looks in the eyes of the audience – I could tell they all felt sorry for me. I imagined them thinking, “this poor girl, she has no idea how to present in public…” And yet I’d been doing it – and loving every bit of it – for years.
It took me a good solid 10 minutes after leaving the classroom for my body to physically be able to speak and respond to the question, “what on Earth happened?” from my co-presenter.
I’ll never really know, but I do know this: I now appreciate the little bit of butterflies that I get before I speak, they tell me my body is physically present and ready. I never let myself get too comfortable before I speak and I always remind myself that I survived that awful experience to go on and give a zillion more presentations that rocked. I know “hitting bottom” helped me better appreciate the presentations that feel really special. 🙂
@LisaPetrilli @MackCollier I’m the first to admit this is a mental block. Your advice to take it one person at a time is something I need to remind myself of. Thanks!
@LisaPetrilli Lisa I know that ‘literally froze’ feeling, otherwise I would have run from the room 9 years ago 😉 Glad you overcame that issue and I hope I get to hear you speak soon, I have heard rave reviews of your speaking!
@LisaPetrilli @TomBLogue I agree Lisa that’s a great strategy, ok I am trying this at the next networking event, thank you!
Mack, I love student presentation days for this exact reason. Students sit in the classroom and judge their professors from the first day of class on (as they well should). But, the truth is that some days are better than others. Some classes are better than others. Some semesters are better than others. Being a professor is like being on a stage performing every day. I love student presentations because it helps the students understand that it’s not easy to stand in front of people and communicate a message clearly. However, it is something that people in the communications industry must be able to do. It’s not optional. I applaud your desire and willingness to overcome your fear. Introverts can give fabulous presentations too, but it’s ok if they aren’t all perfect 😉
Thanks for another great post.
Mack, thanks for sharing this terrifying experience! I think most of us can relate, and it’s great to see little inspirational moments like this. The worst part of failure is anticipating it, that kind of feeling of standing at a precipice. I think it’s true that once we do fail at something, we see it’s not so bad (most of the time!), and the increased confidence we gain from that alone can make us better at whatever it is we want to do.
Great post Mack. I’ve been thinking a lot about failure recently and how the greatest among us have failed the most. If you’re not failing its because you’re not trying. You’re not challenging yourself everyday. If you’re not failing its because you’re not moving forward, you’re standing still.
Before ascending to the Presidency, Theodore Roosevelt lost a mayoralty race and was run out of New York just two years into his term as police commissioner.
Babe Ruth struck over 1300 times on the road to 714 home runs.
Thanks for the post.